My anger is really informational/instructional this week. I get that it’s always there, and that it’s not directly attached to stimuli.

However, I learned a LOT this week! I learned that I’ve been saying, “yes” far too often, and not for the right reasons. I need to say no when I don’t want to take things on, and I need to not care if people think I’m a “bitch” or don’t like my saying, “no”. This applies at work, with my daughter, my ex, my friends, parents, everywhere. I’ve been lying down and taking it in every facet of my life, and I’ve ended up really pissed! It is my own fault. Now I see SO clearly! I need to take responsibility and do things differently for me. I said, “no” to my boss yesterday about taking on a second daily duty, when many folks have none. I’ll just do my one duty, and do it well, thank you. Not two, AND team leader, 3 committees, plus, let’s not forget, my full time teaching job! Enough!

I said, “no” to a friend yesterday, too. It was scary, because she does a lot for me. She also asks for things from me that are beyond the call of friendship, and she knows I’ll say yes. I think we were both surprised that I said no. But I got what I needed and more from it.

I have a right to be here! On the planet! I do not have to earn my place every day, any longer! I am enough! I’m not what I do! I claim my space, free of charge, right now, today!

So I needed to be MORE of a “bitch” , AND less of one, too. That tender spot still beckons me, and I tiptoe around the edges of it. I’ll melt into it when I do.

Gratitude for you is plentiful. THANK YOU.

Love, Amy Kipping

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